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FUN-Nana!

Many people tell me I don’t look my age. I won’t make any secret of the fact that I love that! Frankly, I work at keeping myself fit and dressing youthfully. I enjoy being able to do things that some women half my age struggle with. For instance, I like to ride my bike, and I pride myself that I can still go ten or twelve miles over mixed terrain, that includes some steep hills and gravel trails. I may be over fifty but I’m not ‘over the hill’!

I don’t mind admitting that when my grandson, Elijah, was born I was not too thrilled about the title of Grandma – it definitely conjured up visions of a grey haired older lady in a rocking chair!  I did not want to be labeled ‘Old’! I soon realized I was not alone: Lots of my baby-boomer friends had children when they were in their early 20’s. And those children had children in their early 20’s…which has led to a whole lot of forty something grannies! As most of us don’t want to be reminded that we now fall into the same category as our own grandmothers we’re come up with a long list of creative names: Meemaw, Meme, Mamaw, and probably one of the most popular Nana.

I tried on the title when he was born and it seemed to be a good fit, so I am Nana Karen. Eli is now eleven and this summer he made his first solo flight to visit ‘the Funnana’. That’s what he calls me – I am the fun Nana! I will take him to Crash Comics to buy Magic cards; in fact I am willing to learn to how to play with them. I will let him play Minecraft on my computer and eat ice cream straight from the tub. I will buy him new sneakers (even if he doesn’t really need them) and have a couple of Carl Heisen books waiting when he gets here. (He really likes Chomp and Flush.) We always have a lot of fun together.

But the ‘Funnana’ outdid herself this visit. We went to the City Museum in St. Louis; the one we featured in last month’s issue. It was more fun than we could have imagined from the pictures…amazing place. But it’s full of places to climb, crawl, and scoot through – well not just through: Over, under, around and into would be a more accurate description. And the ‘Funnana’ had to join in! Up there in the cage, waiting for Eli to take a picture, I took a moment to reflect: This time last year I was in a hospital bed on chemo and wondering if I would live until Christmas. Here I was, having a blast, three stories up in a small cage tunnel, surrounded by hundreds of children and adults - and feeling really alive! Thanks Eli for making sure the ‘Funnana’ had fun!

Back to blonde ...

It’s interesting how your hair, especially for women I think, can make a huge difference in self-confidence and attitude. When my hair first started to grow back after I finished my chemotherapy it was platinum, fine and curly! But at least I had hair - hair on my head meant I was recovering and gave me a big boost. It thought it looked cute – kind of Annie Lenox-ish! Then it turned a dark shade of charcoal gray, and became thicker and thicker. It grew in a giant swirl from the crown of my head and curled obnoxiously around my neck as if I had one of my grandmother’s perms! It was too short to style and products just dried it out even more.

My hairdresser, (I can't help it if I still use the English vernacular,) suggested that we try a brown/red shade so that I didn’t notice the curls and swirls as much. I liked it when I left the salon, but a few days later I realized that the platinum hair had made me feel kind of sexy! With blonde hair I stood out in a crowd and I made a statement; I was rocking the post chemo hairdo! Red/brown didn't look natural and it didn't look different. I had lost my mojo. The more I looked at that red hair the less alive I felt...in fact that, coupled with a few extra pounds from celebrating that I could taste food again, and a sluggish metabolism from the sudden onset of menopause, (also due to chemo) and I was downright depressed. A couple of weeks later I stood in front of the mirror and gave myself a good “talking to”. I went on a strict diet, increased my exercise and went back to the salon.

Sheri, my hairdresser was not a happy camper. " It's going to rot off your head sister!" she said, with one hand on her hip and the other pulling at my 3/4 inch hair. "I'm afraid that it won't bleach out to platinum like you want and what are we going to do when you need those roots touched up?!"  I assured her I would not hold her responsible for the outcome.  Heck, it had already fallen out once, so what if I had to shave it off again.

I sat under that drier with bleach on my head for three and half hours. Sheri had to apply bleach twice " Or you'll look like Big Bird!'" she said. "Don't be surprised if your scalp blisters," she added. But once it was washed and trimmed it looked just as I had pictured...and I was back to blonde!

It changed everything: The diet started working and the smile returned to my face. I even went out and bought a truly too tight dress for a charity event the next weekend. I do have to admit that it is breaking off at the tips in places and its very dry. OK, so I have to spray it with 10 Miracle cure twice a day and it may never see a drier again!  Sheri has told me it has to grow out at least another inch before we bleach it and the roots are not my favorite thing.  But she assures me that dark roots and platinum tips will look great!

In my online world...

I’m a communicator so I’ve always tried to keep in touch with my friends and family. When I first moved to the US overseas phone calls were expensive and hardly anyone had a computer. (Well, that gives away my age doesn’t it!) Cell phones were the size of a large briefcase and weighed pounds; not exactly mobile.  We wrote letters and waited two or three weeks for them to be delivered. Ahhhhh the good old days!

But the world of communication has changed and I have a couple of very good examples to share with you to prove the point. A few weeks ago I got a Facebook message from a friend I went to dancing school with back when I was four. What could I tell her about Murray State University?  Now, that’s an odd question from a woman who lives in Portsmouth, England, so I told her as much as I could and directed her to various websites. Then I asked why she was so curious about MSU? “Emma has been invited to join the track team,” she told me. Emma, her eldest daughter, is 18 and has been running for years; apparently she’s good enough to attract the attention of the coach at MSU. Before I had the chance to even get onto SKYPE and talk to the family about the offer I got another message. “We talked to Coach (on SKYPE) and Emma accepted…she starts in August!” Incredulously, of all the places that Emma could have chosen for school she has ended up not 50 miles away from one of her mother’s oldest friends!  ‘Auntie’ Karen is going to be busy next year making sure Emma gets a nice home cooked meal once in a while and that her mother isn’t worried sick about her.

My second example comes from my 89 year old Mum and my 86 year old Uncle. My mum’s laptop has a camera and when my sister is around to encourage her, (and insist she roll her ‘hover round’ up to the desk,) she will talk to me on Google Chat.  She’s always happy to see if my hair is growing, the new “wellington boots” I got for Christmas, or wave at the dogs.  My sister chats and shares what they have been up to all week.  It really feels as if we are not quite so far apart. Uncle Bob is much more technically oriented and often checks to see if I am online and available to chat. Unfortunately, the time difference and this magazine get in the way, but we manage to speak every week or so.  He’s really fun to talk to and we have developed a wonderful relationship over the net!

Britt, my husband, is ‘old school’. He is still a firm believer in a hand written thank you note or a nice card and I certainly agree with him that nothing replaces that personal touch. But while letters were great back in the day, I like the fact that I can now see my friends and family and hear their voices. It’s really nice to speak with my grandson in California and see the new kitten he got recently. I still think it’s amazing that I can ‘Facetime’ with my daughter, or best friend Cheryl, right on my phone. So, if you haven’t taken the plunge into virtual communication I recommend giving it a try. But for my Aunt Edna, who will never embrace ‘modern technology’…I’m writing you a letter.